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MISS MARMELSTEIN (Streisand Barbra)

Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Oh, why is it always Miss Marmelstein? Miss Marmelstein? Miss Marmelstein? Other girls get called by their first names right away They get cozy intimate ... Do you know what I mean? Nobody calls me: "hey, baby doll!" Or "Honey Dear" or "Sweetie Pie" Even my first name would be preferable Though it's terrible, it might be better: it's Yetta! Or perhaps my second name that's Tessye Spells T-E-S-S-Y-E! But no, no, it's always Miss Marmelstein! You'd think at least Miss M. they could try... Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Oh, I could die! I'm a very willing secretary Enjoy my work as my employer will corroborate except for one disappointment one fly in the ointment It's great I mean simply great But the aggravation of my situation I might as well get it off my chest It's the drum appellation Oh pardon the big words I apply But I was an English major at C.C.N.Y. Drum appellation! Well, literally I am persistently addressed Persistently, perpetually, continually and inevitably addressed! Believe me, it could drive a person positively psychosomatic Why is it always Miss Marmelstein? Miss Marmelstein? Miss Marmelstein? Other girls get called by their nick names right away slightly naughty or riske Do you know what I mean? Ha! Ha...Mmmmmmm! Nobody calls me : "Koo-Chee-Koo" or "Boobala" or "Passion Pie" Even "Hey There Babe!" thought not respectable Ain't so objectable It's kind of crummy but chummy Of course if I got married, that would do it So, where's the lucky guy? Ha... Till then it still is Miss Marmelstein! Everyday I get more and more fast Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Miss Marmelstein! Oh...Oh...Oh...! I could Bust!