Midline (Deviates)

I need help I can't leave I can't breathe. I see my way out but I'm in too deep to care. Emotionless, I feel myself about to break. Self-destruction, self corruption, this life I know, this life I hate. With each passing day my outlets slip away. I believe the lies and I dig myself in deeper. I play a daily game of tug a war between What's in my heart and what's on my mind, Not weighing circumstances, passing blindly by my chances Knowing some day I might die. In the silence of my nightmare no one else can hear me scream, No one else knows what I need, no one else believes, I could die and not care. I need something to set me free. Reflections from my past that seem so unreal to me, I'm out of touch I can no longer feel me, My heart is sick and my mind is reeling. Don't know myself, don't know why I still don't care. I'm the only one that's paying, and I'm the only one that's playing. The more I struggle the more I lose. I dig myself in deeper and still don't care Then the moment comes when you reach for my heart, I know it's to hard to find